Are you smoking meth, Jeffrey? I know it isn’t Jeff Bezos personally that makes these decisions on Prime Gaming. Nonetheless, whoever makes those decisions for him has been draining their toilets and splashing it right in our faces. If you’re concerned about the free-to-play/”in-game content,” as usual that’s all there for WoW, WoT, Fall Guys, and other mobile games like BTS Island: In The Seom.
In a little bit of a surprise to me about a week ago now, some games have made a brief return. One such return is Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion, which will be leaving on the 5th of June. It is a great little Turnip-based, top-down adventure in that older pixel-art style of early Zelda games. If you find these young people with their “memes” contemptible, then you might want to give this one a bit of a miss. Otherwise, it is a fun little adventure with a great setting about something that turnips should do. It is also a bit of a farming sim.
A return from last May is Shattered – Tale of the Forgotten King, another prince stepping to the throne of FromSoft in an attempt to Hanover the house that Dark Souls built. Do I care so little about the British throne that I had to double-check at which point we started playing the German national anthem at coronations? The answer to that question is yes. The truth is, there wasn’t much to say about Shattered before, and there still isn’t. It has simple art with a lot of influence from My Chemical Romance. The subtlety might not be there but it is ok for the first French attempt.
Calico joins the mix too, sadly. Every time I see Calico I think I’ll give it another attempt, and yet every time I try, I get put off and get a bit of a sorehead for some reason. It is not a bad game all-in-all, but if you’re expecting something that will constantly keep you on your toes or be very exciting, try Animal Crossing or wait for some paint to dry. Both seem to be more stimulating and less buggy. For a more detailed piece on Calico, Alexx has a review on the cat-based life sim via the Switch port.
The last return I’ll dedicate a whole paragraph to is Beasts of Maravilla Island, a Pokémon Snap-like with full 3D adventure gameplay instead of the pure train-ride experience of Nintendo’s release. Though it is still corridor-based. It is also colorful, wonderful, and filled with lots of things to take pictures of, just what I need. I am obsessed with photo modes in games, as my folders on American Truck Simulator and F1 games will attest. I’m ready to snort Beasts of Maravilla Island from a dwarf’s navel.
All the games listed so far alongside DKO: Divine Knockout, Tiny Robots Recharged, and Double Kick Heroes, will be available until the 5th of June. I believe the only other game to join those previously mentioned and the SNK titles in whatever Prime is doing currently (but hasn’t communicated well) is Tandem: A Tale of Shadows. This is a story-based puzzle-platformer with heavy horror elements but in that 40 Winks style of trying to frighten the bejesus out of children. I’d be lying if I said I knew it well, but then again so would most people as no one has played it in the year and a half from release.
For those waiting for me to talk about the SNK games available this month, don’t worry, Prime forgot to communicate that to me as usual. Joining the collection already available will be Sengoku 2, Mutation Nation, Soccer Brawl, Over Top, The Super Spy, and Top Hunter. From beat ’em ups (it feels weird for that not to be a joke) to more beat ’em ups, to a first-person shooter/beat ’em up. Wow, all these classic games with their variety. I’m sure that joke won’t go over anyone’s head.
Starting on the 15th of June, we’ll have the only noteworthy and interesting game available this month in the previously announced titles. SteamWorld Dig 2 is one of the finest 2D Metroidvanias of the last decade. I don’t say that just because I received most of the SteamWorld series for reviews and might be fishing to do the SteamWorld Build review too. As a series that doesn’t sit still, SteamWorld Dig 2 is everything Steamworld Dig (1) wanted to be and more. Since then the series has dipped into turn-based strategy and card battling. Additionally, it is soon to become a city builder.
Taking a further step back in time to 2002, Neverwinter Nights: Enhanced Edition was a BioWare-made D&D campaign for these new-fangled computers with their 1GHz CPU and GeForce 2 graphics cards. I am intentionally poking the bear on this one because it is the CRPG of the month and as I’ve said before, CRPGs and I don’t get along well. Time for the usual symphony: Dyslexia, older design, slower mechanics, or generally not liking D&D‘s fantasy settings. Take your pick of my “excuses.” If you’re a fan of older RPGs, you’ll have the time of your life, but I’m busy complaining about other things.
Neverwinter Nights and Autonauts are available from the 22nd, the latter being a farming sim with a heavy emphasis on programming. More of an instrument to get younger players into the world of programming with simple tools, Autonauts on paper at least sounds perfect. Though as a repeat of a previous month’s offering, I can’t help but say that some may find it a little disappointing. Colorful and accessible, Denki’s 2019 title might be a great way to test your ability to understand basic programming before learning more as a hobbyist.
The third and final game for the 22nd of June is Revita, BenStar’s twin-stick, Roguelike-Action-Platformer from last April. Both Alexx and Aaron gave reviews of this pixel-based platformer, and I can’t say I’m going to agree or disagree with either. One is my boss, and for a second point, I’ve stated before I have Roguelike/lite fatigue unless it is FTL, Hades, Enter the Gungeon, Loop Hero, or Spelunky. If you’re much like Alexx and can’t get enough Roguelikes from all those dealers on the corners of Steam and Epic, Revita might be for you.
Moving on to the last three available from the 29th of June, we’ll start with Roguebook. This is Abrakam Entertainment SA’s card battling Roguelike from 2021. The overall visual style is a much more colorful Slay the Spire type. The difference of course is the story-book setting mixed with the mechanical fairytale of the characters you’ll fight against. Enemies include a fire-spitting spider with amputated arms for legs. Though I can’t ignore the fact that the design comes from Richard Garfield, the legendary creator of Magic The Gathering.
Once Upon a Jester is, as I’ve recently described to my editor, a “fuzzy-felt finger puppet adventure.” I am sure Dutch developer Bonte Avond wants to strangle me for that. Specifically for reducing their game down to a rather reductive statement that might otherwise put you off. The truth is, the musical-based jester adventure looks like the type of thing aimed at very young children, and it is difficult to get excited about that as a childless 26-year-old. Once Upon a Jester might be a fun little adventure title, but I’m also busy and need something more to sell a game to me.
The final game for June unsurprisingly is a bit of a disappointment, especially given the fact we started so strong on the 15th. Gems of Destiny: Homeless Dwarf is something I am sure some people would rather be called “houseless short person” because to them semantics matter. Jokes about tedious people aside, Gems of Destiny is a Bejeweled ’em up without the fun that comes from the EA-published series. That’s how disappointing it is, I complimented EA of all things.
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