Prime Gaming - January 2022

Please feel very lucky I am not writing about everything available this month with Prime Gaming because, at some point within this article, I would rip a new hole in the crypto-bros for Amazon offering NFTs with Blankos Block Party. Mostly because the point of an NFT (as a concept) was meant to be a unique but digital thing of some form that becomes exclusive to one person, a bit like fine art bought by the super-wealthy in reality, but far more stupid, awfully designed, and painted in neon. Now, it is just microtransactions for in-game skins apparently.

Ok, I’ve had my fair bit about NFTs and the high-school rejects that think the blockchain is going to become the economy we will work on in years to come, let’s talk Prime Gaming. We may have stopped running down everything available, but that doesn’t stop me from telling you that Valorant and GTA Online are still offering in-game “loot,” for whatever that means. Meanwhile, you can now pick up in-game content for Battlefield 2042, Riders Republic, For Honor, alongside many other things that are regulars such as Apex Legends, FIFA 22, Fall Guys, and more.

We’ll start with the slow game because if I start with anger once more I’m sure I’ll never stop. In Other Waters is an unhurried game about Xenobiology from 2020. Highlighted in reviews for breathtakingly simple and tranquil art alongside a beautiful story that was desperately needed by April of 2020, I have a feeling this is something many of us still need. Based on an exploration of the oceans, you’ll have to be in the mood for this one which seems to be as much advice for myself as it is for you.

Next up is something I’ve actually played, according to steam, which tells me Fireblade sent a key for it back when it was released or in early access. I’ve played very little, but I have played it. Another that is about exploring the cold and bitter waters of the ocean, Abandon Ship is far more about the above water matters rather than what’s at the bottom of the sea.

You take control of a ship (seemingly without sails), and explore, battle, and attempt to survive the endlessly hostile waters out at sea and between an archipelago blowing chunks of lava in your direction. It is one of the few examples of the naval combat genre that isn’t a bit crap-looking, and Abandon Ship might be sitting high on someone’s list this month.

Moving onto the EA partnership for this month, which is meant to continue for a further four months, it is another good one: Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order. In the late 2019 Souls-like Jedi ’em up, you control the ultimate ginger with magic space powers and a fizzy stabby stick. I don’t think I have to sell this one to you if you are a Dark Souls fan or even the genre of Souls-like, and definitely not if you are a Star Wars fan. It is difficult to write about Fallen Order without repeating something you’ve heard several thousand times already, pick it up or don’t, it is up to you.

WRC 7 is also available, and I think it is on the edge of niche within this strange month, which I say as a fan of the more modern WRC games. As I’ve said, in the two reviews I’ve done of the games, rallying is not the most popular and accessible of motorsports. Mostly this is because it requires more than adequate precision and understanding of the car you are driving. The trouble with WRC 7 is the fact it was marred with the release of the arguably better Dirt 4, released earlier that same year, for control issues and a lack of depth in comparison.

Two options for you on the Epic Games front this month, and we’ll start with the one I actually like: A viral infection creates mass swathes of people coughing and dying, North Korea is conspicuous with its silence, and the UK is full of morons. No, I am not talking about the pandemic we’re currently in, I’m talking about the 2006 book World War Z and that crap film with Brad Pitt.

Specifically, I’m talking about Saber Interactive’s 2019 game, which is is based on these things. It is basically Left 4 Dead, again. Actually, it is a really nice game where the zombies are threatening because they are swarms that climb each other. it is enjoyable and I like it. Plus it is the Aftermath edition.

Back to Prime for a moment, Paper Beast – Folder Edition is the non-VR version of the game Paper Beast, a downright beautiful paper-craft game about exploration, puzzle-solving, and seemingly it is a bit of a sandbox too. Despite having it already, it is one of the few I have limited hands-off experience with, though I keep wanting to play it. Colorful, interesting, and beyond gorgeous, if I just had more time I’d be playing it. It is the picture of the paper-craft elephant that gets me every time, marching in a line with other paper-craft creatures against a blue sky with pink clouds, it is too inviting.

Despite loving the RTS genre, the one thing I’ve never been able to get remotely close to thus far is the Total War: Warhammer series. Grand in every sense of the word, you control hundreds of little humans, mythical creatures, and some rather big ones too in terms of those flying tiger-griffin things. You’ll be fighting every abomination in the Warhammer universe.

Yes, I am talking about the giant building-sized spiders, or as they are called in the Warhammer universe, just a little thing. Yes, even the topography and building are grand in nature because nothing screams mythical like a bridge that’s ridiculous. Having the 1200 foot gates of hell be your defenses helps too.

Fahrenheit, or as it is called in the one place where they use that unit of measurement Indigo Prophecy: The game David Cage put himself in. Recently in a Peter Molyneux interview, he stated, “the problem with creativity, I always find, is that I am totally incompetent [at it],” yes Peter you are an ideas guy.

Another ideas guy, though crap at that as well, is your friend and mine David Cage. He is a man who thought racism is fixed by singing Kumbaya and holding hands. Unit of measurement the game isn’t that deep, none of his work is, but while it goes completely mental, it does in the best way Cage ever has. Now if you don’t mind, I’m going to hope he’s nowhere near the Star Wars game Quantic Dream is working on.

Finally, the only thing to pull me out of the anger that is David Cage and Peter Molyneux, is the sequel to a Bullfrog game. Two Point Hospital is Theme Hospital 2, and I love it. While it isn’t as darkly cynical or endlessly hilarious, there is still that charm oozing out of every colorful and satirical pore. While I find it hard to say that it is better (thanks nostalgia) Two Point Hospital is something I will always recommend for that solid management kick that I sometimes go on. Pick it up, it is brilliant!