Wonka Is Needless & The Speculated Casting Is Dull

I have spent the morning angrily playing C followed by D# with that followed by A#, something I thought previously impossible. It turns out you can play “Pure Imagination” with nothing but anger. Especially when you know for a fact the newly announced “Wonka” prequel film to be written and directed by Paul King will slow the song down. In fact, they’ll likely change the key to Eb minor, make it needlessly dark, put far more reverb on the powerful Adele-like vocals which will swell to the grand climax before dropping just as quickly as you realized the song itself. This is just me looking at what the trailer will be, and we all know it will happen.

Since the announcement yesterday morning, speculation has flown around like a tweety bird on the Twitter machine, assuming either Tom Holland or Timothée Chalamet will be taking up the role. Why do we need to do this? It is typical for Hollywood to pick one of three actors at a time to play one specific role. I remember when Bradley Cooper was in everything in the early 2010s. More recently it is Chris Pratt and there was a time when Jim Carrey was in every comedy. Florence Pugh is being used endlessly for young women, before her it was Scarlett Johansson and Milla Jovovich, and throughout the 2010s, Mark Wahlberg was needlessly everywhere.

Let me be clear, I don’t think ill of Paul King and his work. The 2014 and 2017 Paddington films are beautiful, wonderful, magical, and two of the best (live-action) family movies that come to mind looking back at the last decade. However, like anyone who has grown up in the last 40-50 years, Gene Wilder is not only some actor who played a role. He is Willy Wonka. I’ve said it in a draft of something we’re planning on publishing in the coming weeks, but I don’t think highly of Roald Dahl. Nevertheless, this is the one thing of his creation I (and I am sure others) hold dear. Disagree with some of Wilder’s other roles, this is the one he’s so fondly remembered for.

I won’t outright say, “you are spitting on his legacy!” That would be overdramatic and something Twitter has already been doing for the last several hours. However, the last time we went through a remake of the classic, it was with Tim Burton. It was disastrously ugly, poorly constructed, and most of all, unnecessary. It was both unnecessarily dark and needless in the first place. Yet we got it and we watched Johnny Depp, another actor excessively used for anything and everything. We watched the cast try to get through what was just crap. The only standout performance being Deep Roy, playing the Oompa Loompas.

Now, let’s quickly look at Paul King’s history, one that is filled with questionable steps. The Mighty Boosh, a surrealists comedy fantasy that has been put on trial for being a show that used Blackface; along with the Little Britain successor Come Fly With Me, which also featured concerning usage of racial tones including Blackface. Not to say all these issues were his decisions, but he did direct several of the episodes of these shows. Of course, more recently his work was the two Paddington films which are fun and joyous, so he can work in a light and fun environment. His most recent TV work involves Space Force starring Steve Carell and Lisa Kudrow, something that grotesquely and with broad strokes satirized the previous US Presidential administration.

My biggest concern isn’t that Paul King could destroy what is arguably one of the best family movies of years gone by, nor do I think the two actors lined up to play Wonka will lead to the destruction of what we all hold dear. I think the problem that is had is that we’re going to be delving into the deeper story of a character that doesn’t need it. Much like the Doctor in Doctor Who, once you try to explain the background of the strange character, you are just making it worse. You are digging yourself a deeper hole that is more or less, filled with liquid tripe. Once again, this prequel to something that is well-beloved seems to be needlessly digging that hole.

With the rumor of Tom Holland or Timothée Chalamet taking up roles, I am once again asking myself a question of why? Of course, Holland has taken up the role of Spider-Man in the Marvel extended universe, but more recently he’s in Dolittle, Spies in Disguise, Onward, and the coming Uncharted film along with crime-drama semi-autobiography film Cherry. Chalamet is known for his roles in Lady Bird, Little Women, and Call Me by Your Name, a role in Homeland, and the upcoming Dune film being lead by him. I’m not saying either actor shouldn’t take roles, I am questioning Hollywood’s use of two actors for everything. If we’re going full steam ahead with an ill-advised prequel, why do we have to do with the safest possible hands with committee-designed cardboard cutouts?

The entire speculation that this one film will be a disaster is irrational. Of course it is. However, when something is often played the safest possible way, when something in Hollywood is designed by a committee, and when something has such history, there is a large chance what comes from that is not good. Just look at 2019’s Cats. I don’t distrust the writers, director, possible actors, or the little I know of the producers.

I distrust the way Hollywood will force hands doing what should not be done. To make this prequel needlessly dark, possibly giving Wonka a history of further abuse as a child that the Depp film enforced greatly, and generally tread on ground that is not required. As the announcement of the film came, the studio behind the film, Warner Bros. has penciled in a 2023 date.