Right, someone needs to get the razors out now, it is getting more than ridiculous. Back once again with the renegade master, Bob Suarez, this is his penultimate episode as director, previously working on Big Mouth and Solar Opposites, as well as previously being a storyboard artist for Daria in seasons 3-5. While previously being an assistant to Mike McMahan here in season 2, and an assistant to Alex Kurtzman in season 2 of Discovery, this is only the second episode of Lower Decks written by season 5 story editor May Darmon. Of course, Darmon has also been a writer and staff writer for McMahan’s Solar Opposites.

Set to do some diplomatic stuff about something, somewhere, on the far side of the sector, the Cerritos experiences a technical hiccup in Stellar Navigation that means the ship is only running on impulse engines. Unless the crew wants to get to Starbase 6, which for a second I crossed up with DS k-7, it would take 400 years to get there. Instead, the nearest place to get to on impulse is Starbase 80, the same Starbase 80 that alt-history Carrol died at in the universe we crossed over with in “Dos Cerritos.”

Cue Mariner jumping around, being overly dramatic, begging and pleading for the ship to instead head to a place that wasn’t troubled by tribbles. At the Starbase, the crew just needs to get their special Stellar Navigation module that allows the ship to use the full power of the warp coils of the nacelles. Maybe while they’re at it, they can work out what happened to Matt and Kimolu, as they float practically dead in their water. Mariner can’t wait to get gone from Starbase 80, thus she is making it all a bit difficult calling every small inconvenience or possible full-scale zombie incursion the Starbase 80 curse.

Oddly enough, despite being a fairly familiar story, which has been my criticism of earlier episodes in the season, I really quite enjoyed “Starbase 80?!”. I don’t enjoy Bradward’s exceptionally offensive attempt at facial hair, as my opening remarks suggest, with a rug on the top lip, sideburns that look okay until you get to the jawline, pubes glued on the jawline, and worst of all, that tiny chin-patch that looks like he’s cosplaying V for Vendetta. Or in this case, P for Probably on a Register. It is awful and I hate it.

The episode is lovely, though: It plays on a bit of something from a previous episode, it shows growth, it plays with the franchise a little, and does something interesting that few other episodes do. Including a comment about the uniforms. However, I think it is probably the perfect episode to encapsulate Lower Decks overall, as Starbase 80 is itself a crumbling mess of a station, with dust somehow older than some of the parts on the station. If there is one thing Lower Decks does well it is a showcase of those older episode ideas, such as seasons 3 and 4 of TNG with the Acamarians and the Tarchanne parasite.

What I could really do without is a reference to season 7 of TNG, and that’s all I’m going to say about that part of the episode. Mostly because it is spoilers – I hate that episode as much as I hate Boimler’s face-fluff. However, Wipeout (US) co-host and Trudy Judy actor Nicole Byer’s bubbly and generally likable Kassia Nox in her Archer cosplay is a delight. Being the stand-in for the moral compass to Mariner’s erratic and sometimes dangerously quick-to-judge character, it is refreshing to have someone else there to bring her down to the ground.

Of course, there is no one else, as for some reason people keep getting zapped by a green thing and turn into Lance Stroll when he sees a wall. It turns out, no matter who you are, a dirty, grimy, horrible, run-down, and any other adjective I can use to describe how disgusting the walls are, there seems to be jam on them, as the brain-dead zombie Cerritos crew begin licking them. Full-on dripping spit and everything.

While Beckett and Kassia are fighting in the medical bay of a semi-Tarchanne Dr. Dick Van Dyke (as played by an Australian), Carrol has her own story. Searching for the engineer of the starbase with Ransom so he can find the module they need. Sent on a wild goose chase, you’d have to be a bit dim to not know where that story goes after a few minutes. I’m not saying I don’t like it, I’m saying that it tracks that it was a bit predictable. As is the whole episode if you know your Star Trek lore, particularly TNG and Enterprise (I still hate that theme Berman and Braga).

Without stepping into spoilers, “Starbase 80?!” is a fun romp of an episode that is both enjoyable and entertaining. Ultimately is it a great episode to return to on a rewatch every time? Probably not, but it is fun while it lasts and doesn’t overstay its welcome by returning us completely back to the characters we had before. I will say that I don’t like the ending. Which again is spoilers, but the idea that such a thing happens and we act like it didn’t next time out is what bothers me. It wanted to tease a long-term change but didn’t want to commit.

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Lower Decks "Starbase 80?!"

7.5

Score

7.5/10

Pros

• A fun, romp episode.
• A slightly different dynamic from Beckett.

Cons

• Boimler's face fluff.
• That ending wants to be doing something, but falls flat.