Hitchhiker’s Guide to Ferenginar. Listen, if I didn’t do it, then you’d all be thinking of it anyway. This episode is directed by Brandon Williams, who was behind the wonderful “In the Cradle of Vexilon,” though I’d argue this is a lesser showing from the storyboard artist turned director. Meanwhile, it was written by former Late Show (with Colbert) writer, Cullen Crawford in his only appearance in Trek. I think I know which series is his favorite. I also think I know exactly what parts of Deep Space Nine he loves the most.

Under the orders of Jack, our main four (minus T’lyn for good reason) are sent to update the Starfleet Guide to Ferenginar after Grand Negus Rom and Leeta want a progressive Ferenginar to join Starfleet. Meanwhile, Mariner is bummed because she isn’t being shouted at daily anymore, Samanthan and Tendi have to pretend to be a couple (WHY!?!?), and Boimler is introduced to this weird thing called “capit-alism.” I guess Premier Anatoly Cherdenko was wrong. There is no place that hasn’t been corrupted by capitalism.

As a fan of DS9 and someone who also loves the Ferengi’s, there is plenty to adore about “Parth Ferengi’s Heart Place.” At the same time, there is a small sense of filler to the episode as a whole until we get to the mystery ship in the next four episodes. I’ve begged and pleaded for us not to have Tendi and Rutherford as a “Will they/won’t they,” and where it matters, everything else is about reinforcing what we already know. Aside from a dribble of story with Beckett and a whole lot of references, I don’t know what to recommend.

I know I am supposed to find the awkward nature of Rutherford and Tendi pretending to be a couple as a joke, but it feels like someone thought a clown riding a bike and playing a tuba was too subtle, so it was stepped up a little. At the very least Jack could have said it was a rib that senior staff play on Lt Jgs. Instead the “punchline” is that they found the pretend relationship awkward, but they are ok laying on top of each other halfway in a Jeffrey’s tube: sex implied. I just don’t get it.

This is one of the few times I’m thankful that Lower Decks has a shorter runtime than its franchise counterparts. While the Tendi-Sam story isn’t 99% of “Parth Ferengi’s Heart Place,” there is a large portion taken up with “Isn’t it awkward that two platonic friends have to pretend to love each other.” Thankfully that’s broken up with stories that are emotionally worth getting invested in, like Carrol dealing with a child, Mariner coming to terms with growing up, and Boimler seeing ads in the Ferengi version of NCIS/Rush Hour.

Watching the suck-up that is Boimler get consumed by drama and capitalism to the nth degree, is refreshing, it is interesting, and there is something we don’t often see. However, it is also heavily referential. Meanwhile, Mariner is on her usual path of self-destruction to avoid the reality that she’s being trusted/treated with respect. This time being indebted to a long-time Ferengi friend who gets her out of jail after starting a fight in a public library… With Dabo and Scorta.

Oh yeah, you didn’t expect a Latin joke in a standard review. The truth is, I care more about Mariner’s maturity than I care about Rutherford and Tendi eventually having sex on the flight controls. If they wanted to put their hands inside each other, then they should just do that, but for now, I don’t care. I care more about the episodic buddy-cop drama than I care about Rutherford and Tendi’s relationship, which is saying a lot given it is just a throwaway gag.

As is the fact that Admiral Vassery is stupid enough to fall for Rom and Leeta’s little game. Carol is the only adult to know “Hey, these Ferengis are a little shakey when it comes to honor, maybe be a little skeptical.” I’m not saying that you should be racist, but they have the Rules of Acquisition for a reason. Capitalism is their religion, it is like assuming Muslims pray 5 times a day.

I do like “Parth Ferengi’s Heart Place,” mostly for the name, the references, and the good bits of comedy, but mostly for the actual stories that seem to be moving forward. Ferenginar joins the Fed to find this mystery ship, Mariner comes to terms with being in a position of power and status, and Boimler has something that loosens him up. Yeah, Lower Decks is a comedy series, but it also needs to advance, and here it felt begrudging to do so.

Ultimately, “Parth Ferengi’s Heart Place” while inoffensive as it references back to Deep Space Nine, I’m left wanting something more than a return to the status quo with Tendi and Rutherford. If we’re doing this, give us something more than awkwardness. I much prefer Carol swindling Rom into the Fed as a storyline as it moved us forward a little, giving us something beyond the references and jokes. I don’t think I’ll be excited to come back to Cullen’s only episode thus far, but I’m still excited to see what he does next.

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Lower Decks "Parth Ferengi's Heart Place"

6.5

Score

6.5/10

Pros

• Rom and Leeta.
• Boimler and capitalism.
• DS9-era references.

Cons

• Do we need the awkward story between Tendi and Sam?
• Return to the status quo after the relationship storyline.