“Don’t Sniff Your Steam Deck,” Says Valve

Do I really need to explain this one? The internet is once again at the height of, “Why do you exist to do these things?” In a now-viral post on Reddit, one user by the name of Metapod100 asked Steam Support: “Is it safe to inhale the exhaust fumes from the top vent of the Steam Deck? It’s somewhat of a meme to enjoy the fumes[,] but I think I kinda… like it?” Ahh, the smell of thermal paste slowly burning, it really puts you in the Christmas spirit.

Do I need to explain why sniffing the fumes coming from your tech gadgets is bad? I really shouldn’t have to, but Steam Support responded anyway: “As with all electronics, it is generally not recommended you inhale the exhaust fumes on your device. While there are no safety concerns with general usage, directly inhaling the device’s vent fumes should be avoided.” Well, thank you for stating the obvious, anything else? “We understand that it may be a meme, but please refrain from this behavior for the safety of your health.”

Well, I am so glad that was stated, next I need to phone up Duracell to ask if I should be licking 9v batteries. I mean, seriously, this is the thing you are sending support desks? I have a little rhyme for this: Roses are red, violets are blue, the internet is stupid, and so are you. Of course, this great insight is being meme-d in itself, with the man that apparently everyone should be following off of a bridge, Sean Murray, tweeting the least ambitious thing he’s said in his whole life. No.

no pic.twitter.com/OFXcMiYXws

— Sean Murray (@NoMansSky) December 12, 2023

Next time can we collectively ask Elon Support if we should be sticking the charging cable for Teslas up ourselves? That way natural selection can kill off some of the stupid among us who’ll be sniffing Steam Decks for the next while.