Borderlands 3 Is Free On Epic

Monday, Kao hopped along to reveal more character details. Tuesday, Toy Soldiers continued to go to war after being patched up at a discount, and Valve’s TF2 was recently plagued by bots. Wednesday, Game Pass revealed more in wave 2 for May, with Jurassic World Evolution 2 leading the way. Thursday, Hellpoint got a next-gen release date, and Furi got a new DLC alongside an update.

Moving on to this week’s mystery game, or at least it was a mystery until yesterday morning, Borderlands 3. I don’t like Borderlands 3, I don’t like Borderlands in general because it is a nothing series built on an empire of pointing at a thing and laughing at it without actually making it a joke. It is something that is typically labeled a comedy game, but it lacks the formula of a joke being followed through or being funny. Instead it uses voices that are grating and non-sequiturs to create the concept of something humorous.

The reason the Borderlands series survives is simply as a result of being one of the formative co-op experiences for those growing out of the PS2-era and into teens. Gone are the days of twiddling the analog sticks to make the Saibamen grow before going Super Saiyan 4 Gogeta and destroying a planet in the best fighting game ever. Now a stupid little robot has to make a noise while falling over, and thus it is the height of multiplayer experiences. The truth of the matter is, either the game with swearing and mediocre gunplay or the game where you can beat Gohan to death with the wet end of his arm are going to be fun in multiplayer.

You have fun because of the other person, not the game. Borderlands 3 is hardly more than a shooting gallery at the fair, something you found fun at the time with someone else but is, itself, forgettable. “So why aren’t you saying anything about Borderlands 3?” I hear you say? What is there to say, beyond that it’s another one of those games where you chase down a rumored vault full of treasure in a world full of cults of personality and violence? Violence to beget violence in a world supposedly brimming with a story, it is just a shame you aren’t there when it happens and that it doesn’t actually matter.

Covered in the ever-present luminescent magenta, you’ll go from one dull place to another shooting roughly the same people half a billion times so you can generate better numbers to kill the next lot. it is full of samey quests and parrots that will only talk once you’ve gotten the magenta marker above them to light up, who will offer more quests and gear to make your numbers bigger. If you’ve been skimming and haven’t picked it up yet, I don’t like Borderlands 3 or any of its predecessors for that very reason. It is another pit for 2K to make monkeys grind and fill its pockets until the next GTA comes along.

All this week, you can pick up Borderlands 3 on the Epic Games Store until the morning of the 26th. Though if you are that interested, I am sure you already own it either here or elsewhere. Nevertheless, Borderlands 3 is just the start of four weeks of the Epic Store Mega Sale, and four weeks of mystery games. You can pick up Tiny Tina’s Wonderlands for 20% off, Dying Light 2 for 10% off, Sifu for 20% off, Loop Hero for 50% off, Final Fantasy 7 Remake Intergrade for 29% off, Disco Elysium for 65% off, and even Ghostwire: Tokyo for 34% off. Though, of course, by picking up Borderlands 3, you’ll also be able to use the Mega sale coupon, getting you 25% off anything over $14.99.