Right, let’s go Sexy, we’ve got Doctor Who fan service to get on with. Alexx, before you go editing that out, it has to do with the episode. I’m not just trying to mess with you, as was the case with the entire review of “The Impossible Astronaut” & “Day of the Moon.” I think it is hands up time, time to admit that until now I’ve never properly seen all of “The Doctor’s Wife.” I’ve said it before and I’ll happily say it again. I don’t like the grim and dark aesthetic to anything. Even in episodes I enjoy I’m not pulled in by that; often it’s the opposite effect.

Neil Gaiman’s first episode is what you’d expect from a Moffat-run series episode. Unlike the last episode’s sedate mood, there is a lot of energy, a lot of throwing everything at the wall, and a lot of what feels like getting punched in the head with references and callbacks. Or as Sexy does point out, a lot of saying what is about to be said. I guess that is what happens when you put the consciousness of a T.A.R.D.I.S in a human. She doesn’t know what is the right direction of time in the linear dimension we’ve restricted it to.

See, I don’t mind the episode on its quality of writing, it is just the turn toward horror that Gaiman and Moffat enjoy that i have an issue with. Seemingly others also enjoy the horror twist, but call me old hat, I like the fun space adventure which this is once you drill down past the looks of it. This episode is a slightly disturbing adventure, one with Michael Sheen putting on a voice I’d have pegged as Gambon-esque given the similarities. Sheen voices the being known as House, projecting an old Rory into Amy’s head, as well as a dead Rory that scrawled on the walls for House to kill her instead. It happens to be a very Gaiman-esque turn of unsettling, one I don’t enjoy.

I mean the whole thing is very unsettling, in what I’d assume was a direction from Moffat as showrunner. House has been calling Time Lords outside of the universe to feast on their T.A.R.D.I.S’ for years. “That’s enough to make anyone dangerous” as Smith says in his very angry old man way, giving him hope that maybe he’s not the last of his kind in existence. Only for Auntie and Uncle to receive every Time Lord’s… extra parts, hence Uncle’s two left feet and Auntie’s manly left hand from a big bloke. It is very dark in that respect alongside the dirty and dim design to everything you see.

I think Suranne Jones’ Idris (Sexy) is pulling it together with Smith. Of course, this is all helped by Gaiman’s writing. However, there is just something about the episode I can’t quite put my finger on for not entirely loving. It is not the Blue Peter competition-designed spliced together T.A.R.D.I.S console. Nor will I ever moan about 9 and 10’s console room making a return as a guest. There just happens to be something about the episode that doesn’t click, and I think it starts with the overbearing grimness of the visuals. That ultimately spews out into distracting me from other sections to enjoy.

I’ve referenced it several times now, Smith calls Idris Sexy because House removed the T.A.R.D.I.S’s matrix and put it in her, so she’s the T.A.R.D.I.S with a voice. This opens up a Pandorica of Doctor Who references to make including the single Ood trapped with Auntie and Uncle. Specifically there is Nephew, with the line “Another Ood I failed to save.” There is the reference to the desktops changing, killing every other Time Lord as the War Doctor, getting rid of rooms, the fact there are other console rooms in the T.A.R.D.I.S, and so on. Then there is the line “the only water in the forest is the river,” what in the whole program references water?

I think the only proper letdown in the whole episode is the fact that for a majority of its runtime, Mr. and Mrs. Pond are punted to the sidelines for House to later play with them a bit. As I said, it created that rather painful and uncomfortable scene of Rory’s so-called death, only for it to be punctured like a balloon just as quickly. Sure, we’ve already had the episode of Amy feeling sad about Rory’s death with “Amy’s Choice.” However, this was throwing up your hands and saying “what the hell!” Effectively doing it, as is said in the wrestling community, a cheap pop.

It’s not the best episode, I wouldn’t even go as far as to say it was the best so far, but under all the critiques I can give it, “The Doctor’s Wife” is still excellent. When juggling several things while riding the unicycle of playing with lore, one unbalanced moment could lead to a very unfortunate accident. The whole episode is about a box expressing she stole a man, while for nearly 50-years, he’s thought he was “borrowing” her. Arguably the whole strength of the episode lays in that character, the unique viewpoint we’ll never see (hope) again.

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Doctor Who "The Doctor's Wife"

9

Score

9.0/10

Pros

• "Do fish have fingers?"
• Just a sad old man who wants to be forgiven.
• The relationship between the Doctor and the T.A.R.D.I.S explored.
• "Pull to open"
• "No, but I always took you where you needed to go."

Cons

• Just a bit too tragic and grim.
• Amy and Rory being shunned.