Like other fans of The Magicians, I was upset by the season 4 finale for multiple reasons. From plot threads being discarded, character motivations shifting unexpectedly for no discernible reason, and of course, the Quentin shaped elephant in the room, I felt betrayed in part by season 4. However, now that season 5 has begun and I have started my reviews of each episode (you can find Episode 1’s review here, as well as Episode 2’s review,) I have begun to feel conflicted.

Before I go into more detail on that, let me back up a little and mention that there was a point that I didn’t think I would watch season 5 at all. I should also mention that I still find myself unable to rewatch the finale of season 4 because of how frustrated I am by it. Regardless of why Jason Ralph left the show, the writers treated Quentin’s exit poorly, and seemingly have no remorse for that.

With that being said, I’m going to say something that a portion of the fanbase probably isn’t going to like. Even when the writing is full of holes and things aren’t going the way some of us might want, The Magicians is one of the best shows on broadcast television. Does that excuse the writers? No, and if you’re someone conflicted about whether you should support the show because of it, allow me to be honest with you in a way a lot of people won’t.

We as humans are complex. There are nuances to a lot of things, including how we feel. So, we can still find enjoyment in a show that hurt us, because those two things are not mutually exclusive. In spite of that, there are some people who may find it too painful or taxing on their mental health, to watch a show that hurt them so deeply. In that case, if your engagement with the series is limited to reading reviews, or simply talking to fans that are watching it, then that’s okay.

Alternately, if you choose to ignore season 5 entirely and focus on writing your own fictional takes on it, that’s your choice too. However, let me give you a few reasons why I think people should watch season 5 if their mental health allows it. Firstly, the acting is incredible. I have never in my life seen a cast with so much chemistry that every scene feels real and believable from an emotional acting standpoint. Even when the writers don’t remember the story they’re telling, or they don’t know what to do with a character, each actor in the show makes the most of what they have, and it shows.

In fact, I initially decided to watch season 5 to support the cast and to allow myself to provide a service to other fans, writing reviews so that if they didn’t feel like they could watch it themselves, they could still engage in the conversation.

I can understand some people not wanting to support certain writers which I will not name because frankly if you follow the situation, you know who they are. However, these actors are so dedicated, that it would be a disservice not to give credit to their hard work. In particular, I find Hale Appleman, Olivia Taylor Dudley, Summer Bishil, Arjun Gupta, and Stella Maeve a joy to watch in every scene, even the painful ones.

Granted, the rest of the cast is good at what they do, but as a viewer, I don’t resonate with many other characters as much as I do Eliot, Alice, Margo, Penny, and Julia.

My second reason that I think fans should watch may get me some flak from people, because it could be construed as providing false hope to those who loved Quentin. If people don’t watch season 5, there won’t be a season 6. If there’s no season 6, and Quentin doesn’t come back at the end of season 5 (or if he does, and they leave it on a cliffhanger) you’ll never see the end.

His story isn’t over and I think anyone familiar with the show can tell that much. If you look at Twitter right now I’m sure you could find half a dozen fans, with a thousand different ideas of how his story could continue. Hell, go on any fanfiction website, there’s a dozen fanfiction creations that provide alternate story ideas.

I could go into more detail about fanworks and the importance of them, but that’s a topic for another article. Granted, there is always the risk that you could watch and Quentin’s character could never return, neither played by Jason Ralph or a recasted actor. However, how do we know unless we try and see it through?

The third reason is that even though some of the storylines aren’t what many fans thought they were getting with season 4, the episodes have been good so far. The acting is strong, there are plenty of plot threads that have kept me interested, and Quentin’s death is not merely glossed over in the first five minutes. It has been heavily felt.

The characters are processing in their own way, and it reflects how we process tragedy in our own lives. Some people check out completely, some people find solace in doing things to honor those we’ve lost, and some people take longer to grieve because maybe they don’t want to believe that person is truly gone.

Yes, there is a tonal shift in the series. It is more somber now because the characters are grieving along with the fans who loved Quentin. Yet that shouldn’t deter people from trying to see where the story goes. People may not like it and the show could get canceled tomorrow, but unless fans watch and see, all they can do is wonder.

With that being said, there are some of you who have already determined that season 5 is not good for you, your mental health, or anything else. If you are someone who hopes the show gets canceled, while I disagree, I also understand it. We all respond differently, sometimes we just hope the thing that hurts us goes away.

There is nothing wrong with avoiding something that isn’t good for you. That’s the beauty of being nuanced individuals with different feelings, beliefs, and minds. Truthfully, I expected to be turned off by this new season. I expected it to be harder to watch, even with some of my favorite actors involved.

Season 3 of The Magicians is high on my list of best seasons of television ever, especially in the fantasy genre. Season 5 feels somewhat similar in an odd way. The key quest in season 3 seamlessly brought a variety of storylines together in a cohesive way that was incredibly satisfying, even to the end.

Season 5 feels like, two episodes in, it might carry that same energy. Maybe it’ll capture that lightning in a bottle again, or maybe it’ll go the way of season 4 and be great up to the end, only to take a sharp right turn into the parking lot of frustration and sadness. Either way, watching the show to see what happens or even just to support the actors, doesn’t absolve the writers for how they handled things.

It reminds me of a conversation I had with my best friend after season 4 ended. When The Magicians is good, it is really good. At its best, it is genre-defining television. When the writers decide to be edgy or mix things up? Well, sometimes that goes really bad. Your mileage may vary really.

In the end, it all comes down to what you think is right for you. If you start watching season 5 and it is too much, there’s no shame in stopping. If you start watching it and you see it through to the end, that’s just as valid. Even just looking for spoilers on Twitter and other review sites just to see where your favorite characters are is valid.

All we can do as media consumers is ingest the things we love and talk about them. Sometimes the things that can cut the deepest are the things and people we love, so even if something hurts you and you talk about that, it doesn’t mean you loved it any less. Be honest with yourself because in the end, whether you watch The Magicians season 5 or not, it doesn’t make you any less of a fan of the series. You just may decide that it is better for you to step out.

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