You’d think it would be hard to play all these games for the Epic Games store articles and Phenixx Gaming as a whole; and it is, to an extent. Between eating all the biscuits, playing all the games, sleeping with your mum, and watching several TV shows, I’m a busy man. So sometimes I want to play something a little more relaxing, as I used Skyrim for this past week after playing Death Stranding for the week prior.

Leisure isn’t something I’m known for, so of course, what I’m calling relaxation is probably someone’s nightmare. So let’s begin with a bit of battle strategy for protecting Father Ted from the black and white minstrel showcase that wants to entertain him. Jokes aside about my inability to “relax,” whatever that means, via obscure 90s comedies about Irish clergymen on a small island. Bad North is a game about protecting a small island from an invading group of minimalist figures dressed in all black. It’s like the march of the Evanescence fan-club.

Through minimalist is possibly the keyword, as you play small battles on small islands, with small groups of men. Might as well be an illegal Ewok fighting ring. On these small islands, there are houses, hovels, and even churches, all for you to protect them with your little blue men (or women). Starting out you are only given remedial weapons, a rusty shiv if you’re lucky, and some tactical advantages such as inclines for the enemy to attempt to climb. It might sound like a simple Command and Conquer-style nightmare to some, but it refines all of those many hours spent getting into that huge battle down to minutes.

I went into this one assuming I’d hate the slightly turn-based approach it gave off. However, Bad North simply has that almost FTL: Faster Than Light factor to commanding a bunch of people on rampaging battlefield during the cutest war you’ve ever seen. It is like the Blue Man Group are fighting the klan’s racist ‘parody’ of themselves, and it is adorable. As well as commanding your boys in blue to kill dark figures with what looks like weapons in the thick fog, you get a slow-motion equalizer to the menacing hordes. Much like FTL’s pause function, hold the space bar, and you have a moment to figure out how and where you’re to be.

For the most part, I don’t have much to nitpick, for once, and it is strange to enjoy something as a surprise like this. Particularly something with such a simple loop that it looked too easy to make into a turn-based nightmare.

Bad North: Jotunn Edition is free on the Epic Games store all this week until the morning of Thursday November 29th. While we’re on free games, if you were quick to this article, Humble Bundle are giving away copies of Serial Cleaner for free; if that’s not enough, David wrote a review here. Back to the Epic Games store, next week’s free game will be a surprise 2D return for to the world of Rayman as Rayman Legends will be next week’s Epic Games store freebie.

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